GI JOE: RETALIATION

imagesCAG2RKQ1GI JOE: RETALIATION (4/2/13-Odyssey)
GI JOE! All-American Hero!
See stuff blown up!
BAM! Who are they fighting? BAM. Don’t know. But BAM! LOOK OUT, THE ROCK!
See Channing Tatum try and nearly miss this disaster!
GI-JOE PLASTIC DOLL TURNED MOVIE HERO!
BOOM! The President isn’t the President! Duh! Didn’t you see “GI JOE: Rise of Cobra?”
Obviously America would start an elite squad called the Joes. And obviously its female member would be named Jane.
Bruce Willis! Over-the-hill Ex-River cop hero!
Saddest of all, Bruce isn’t even bad ass! He’s just old and stuff.
On a side note, I saw this on film…on a huge giant Odyssey screen. So, I actually kind of enjoyed the big dumb experience. I mean, not much is expected when you are going to a movie based on a Hasbro toy. But I slouched in my seat, with my over-priced popcorn, and saw the several huge production labels roll across the screen…and I knew I would at least be entertained.
Maybe the huge studios who insist on removing brains from their movies should have thought twice about removing film from them as well. Seeing it on big bad celluloid sort of brought a smile to my face and I wasn’t too upset leaving the theatres. Which is a lot to ask, given how crap it all was. I really can’t even tell you who the bad guy was other than that he was the guy that gets into the helicopter in the end so that he can be ready for “GI Joe 3.”
Silly movie studios? And, if you read this while watching the flick on some digital format and you think I’m an idiot for not completely trashing the movie, you would probably be right.

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